Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.

ECCLESIASTES 4:9–12

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Growing up, I was forever dreaming of my ‘happily ever after’. The specifics evolved, but a kind, loving husband was always present. Now, as an adult, it’s abundantly clear that walking down the aisle in a white dress isn’t the key to bliss – in fact, no marriage is perfect, and not all marriages are happy. As followers of Jesus, we’re not immune to this relational breakdown. So, what’s the secret to contentment when facing fertility struggles, financial burdens, health problems, and communication catastrophes?

Well, today’s passage is a simple, but perhaps much-needed, reminder, that ‘two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed’. All too often, couples forget they’re on the same team and have made a covenant commitment to be there for each other – for better, for worse, in sickness, and in health.

What’s more, couples can get so consumed with each other or the busyness of daily life they forget that ‘three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken’. This unshakeable unity derives from the third cord, which is God himself. Because ultimately, the foundation of a flourishing marriage is when both husband and wife are committed to relationship with Christ and are seeking to reflect him in all they say and do.

What does that look like in practice? As an unmarried woman, I can’t speak from experience, but here are some ideas I’ve seen played out in my friends’ lives. Instead of treating the household chores like a scoreboard, commit to doing the cleaning together – you might even enjoy it with some good tunes on in the background.

When one of you ‘falls’ – or, in more everyday language is battling poor mental health, redundancy, or bereavement – take active steps to ‘reach out and help’ them. On occasion, choose to give five-a-side a miss to cook supper for your spouse, take on extra shifts to lessen the financial and emotional pressure on your spouse while they look for work, or simply be a listening ear – even when you’re exhausted from kids’ bedtimes and deadlines.

As you do these things, plan in time for both you and your spouse to invest in your relationship with God. Because ultimately, your desire for an enduring, perfect, promise-keeping love is an intrinsic part of being human and is ultimately fulfilled in your relationship with Jesus. It’s from that secure relationship that you can love your spouse well, as you follow his pattern of self-sacrificial, lavish love.

Sophie Sanders
Marketing & Communications Lead

How can you sacrificially love your spouse – or support friends who are married – this week?

P.S. Whilst there’s much biblical wisdom for how to flourish in a marriage, it would be naïve to think that all struggles can be resolved through prayer and self-sacrificial love. If you have been the victim of domestic violence or adulterous actions, you might find our recent devotional entitled ‘The unspeakably treated’ a helpful read and we’d encourage you to seek professional support.